Demon Prodigy's Apprentice
by Sakura245
Summary: Life had never been kind to Atsushi. He'd grown up in an abusive orphanage, and he'd been banished from that orphanage. On top of that, a man-eating tiger stalks him no matter where he goes. So, when a man from the notorious Port Mafia offers him a job and a place to belong, how can he refuse? Maybe there he can find what he's been looking for his whole life. Or will it kill him?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, everyone! Happy New Year! I posted this on AO3 earlier, and recently just remembered that I should probably post it here. I've been working on this fanfiction for a while, and hopefully, I can be semi-consistent in posting new chapters. I just got my wisdom teeth out yesterday, and sometimes posting new chapters and such makes me feel better. So, yeah. **

**Anyway, here's another Port Mafia! Atsushi fanfiction!**

**Enjoy!**

It was a gut feeling.

_Don't move._ Atsushi told himself as he pressed a hand to his mouth. _Don't make a sound. _His muscles ached from being pulled taut for so long. He wasn't sure how long he'd been hiding for or why he was hiding at all. He only knew that he was hiding from the men who swept the area with flashlights before they'd found the light switch and plunged the whole place in light.

_Don't let them find you. Stay where you are. Run as soon as their backs are turned. _The voice in his head hardly sounded like his own. There was no tremble to it; it had a commanding ring to it that made him obey.

Atsushi fought the urge to shift in his tiny hiding space; he was so hungry that he wanted to double over to try to ease the pangs. The space between the crate and the brick wall was suffocating, even for him. He was lucky that he had such a small frame. If he'd been any bigger, his cramped hiding spot would be impossible to fit into.

"Do you think he slipped out without our notice?" One voice asked. It sounded so close that Atsushi nearly jumped.

"Doubt it," another voice, a little further away, replied. "The doors are still shut and it would be obvious if he tore through a wall."

"Well, it's not like he has many places to hide! How else would a ti-"

The voice was cut off by a long, metallic sound that echoed off the walls and ceiling of the warehouse.

Atsushi bit his lip as the sound rang in his ears, making his head feel like it was about to explode.

"Yes, Sir," one of the men said after a moment of deafening silence. "No, we haven't found him yet." Another pause. "Understood."

"What's the status?"

"He decided to send in the demon prodigy. He'll be here soon."

_The demon prodigy._ The title alone made Atsushi's blood run cold. He had no idea who it was, but he could guess that nicknames like that weren't given out like party favors.

"So, what do we do until then?" A new voice asked.

Atsushi leaned his head forward just a bit, trying to hear the conversation more clearly. His head bumped lightly against the splintered wood of the huge crate in from of him. He held his breath, hoping that the small _thud_ was too small to notice.

"Guard all exits," a voice that carried more authority stated. "If it tries to run, shoot to kill."

Black spots crawled into Atsushi's vision with that order. He felt sick to his empty stomach. He pressed a hand to his abdomen and his other hand to his mouth, trying to keep from dry heaving at the thought.

"_Why did you expect anything different?" _His headmaster's voice played in his brain. "_This is the only kind of end you deserve, hunted down like a feral animal."_

He swallowed bile, fighting back a scream that built up in his throat.

_I know that. _He thought in response. _I already know! But even if that's all I deserve, I don't want to die!_

His stomach growled, reminding him that he hadn't eaten enough for the past few days. Any other time, he would just ignore it. It was normal to him after all, but now… Now, that simple growl was dangerous. Had the men heard that? Would they be able to find him now and put a bullet through his skull?

Atsushi held his breath, praying that the faint hum of the electricity in the building would be enough to drown out the sound of his hunger.

Another minute passed by, and he heard no footsteps in his direction and no gunshots. He suppressed a sigh of relief. He was by no means safe, but for the moment, he was still hidden.

/-/-/

"An odd place for a tiger to run," Dazai muttered as he stepped out of the car; his fingers wrapped a little tighter around the cup of ramen in his hand. He glanced at the text message on his phone. "How do twenty of our men fail at finding a five hundred pound cat?"

Many of the men stared at him, their bodies tensed.

Dazai clicked his tongue boredly before groaning and mumbling, "I can't believe I got pulled off the bridge for this."

"What are your orders, Dazai-_san_?" One of the bolder agents asked.

"Wait here." He pocketed his phone and stirred what remained of the noodles with his chopsticks.

"B-But, Dazai-_san_, it-"

"What? It's a tiger that can kill me before I have time to blink? I certainly hope so. Dying like that would almost make up for getting dragged into this earlier." He glanced at the man, giving him a cheerful smile that was devoid of light. "Give me fifteen minutes."

/-/-/

Atsushi wasn't sure how long he'd been standing there. He wasn't skilled at estimating elapsed time based on how badly his muscles hurt. It felt like hours, so he guessed about an hour.

An hour since the demon prodigy had been called in, an hour of waiting with clenched teeth, shallow breaths, and a heart beating so hard that it felt like it would break his sternum. An hour of forcing his body to remain still and forcing his lungs to accept the heavy air in his tiny, suffocating space.

At a few points, he genuinely considered walking out with his palms held up in surrender. It definitely wasn't ideal, and he had no idea what would happen if he did that, but he did feel like anything would be better than barely breathing. The voice in his head held him back.

_Don't move._

_Don't even think about going out there!_

_They'll kill you, and that's if you're lucky._

So, he didn't move a muscle. He kept taking shallow breaths that hardly satisfied his lungs and listened to every sound in the warehouse.

No one spoke now. He could hear footsteps, but otherwise, it was nearly silent.

_Is this the demon prodigy? _He thought, swallowing hard. It only sounded like a single person searched now, and Atsushi began to wonder if this person was an actual demon.

He was approaching. Footfalls getting louder as they got closer to him. His heart beating harder with every step the person took.

Atsushi could hear a heavy sigh and the footsteps stopped. He could smell something. He wasn't quite sure what it was, but he knew it was food. His mouth watered as his stomach growled again. Atsushi stifled a gasp. Had the man heard his stomach growl? Did that give him away?

Something banged against the crate that Atsushi hid behind. He flinched, biting back a shriek.

For the second time that day, a loud ring filled the space.

"No, I haven't found him yet," the man said after answering the phone with a quiet click. "Well, it's a big warehouse, really he could be hiding anywhere." A pause, then more footsteps. "No, I don't need help, and frankly I believe he'd slow me down."

The man kept talking, and his footfalls were beginning to sound further away. The aroma of food was still there, still close.

_He left his food behind. _Atsushi realized, salivating and feeling his stomach ache with hunger.

He was beginning to feel dizzy. He _needed _to eat.

Slowly, slowly, Atsushi slipped out from his hiding place. He just needed to silently grab the food while the man was distracted. He squeezed through the narrow space between two crates. He could see it. A styrofoam cup of noodles sat unguarded right in his field of vision.

It was even better than he expected! He didn't even need to completely leave the hiding place. All he had to do was go to the edge and grab it. Easy enough. He'd stolen several secret meals in the orphanage's kitchen. He tried to convince himself that this was no different.

_Almost there… _He thought, nearing the open space. He awkwardly leaned to one side because he didn't have the room to crouch. His fingers wrapped around the hot styrofoam cup. The corners of his lips pulled up for a second. He'd be able to _finally _eat something.

"Gotcha."

Out of nowhere, a bandaged hand grabbed his wrist.

Atsushi shrieked and tried to pull away, but whoever grabbed him didn't let him get far. His captor yanked on his arm, forcing him out of his hiding spot. Atsushi stumbled out, desperately trying to pry the man's fingers from his wrist.

He caught Atsushi's other wrist, his hands bruising him. He fought, knocking over the cup of noodles in the struggle. Atsushi bit back a starved cry as the food went to waste on the ground. If it weren't for the man's tight hold, he'd have eaten it off the ground without a second's hesitation.

"Calm down," he ordered, yanking Atsushi forward.

Atsushi's breath caught in his throat, hunger forgotten when he slowly lifted his eyes to his captor. He shook when he met his eyes, or rather eye, since one eye was covered with bandages. That one uncovered eye was hard and narrowed and made Atsushi shrink back.

It was clear now why they called him 'the demon prodigy'. There was something unnerving about the utter lack of light in his eye, and how under his gaze, Atsushi felt so much smaller than he ever had before.

The man's hands shifted below Atsushi's wrists and he gripped his forearms, squeezing them slightly as though he was trying to measure how much meat Atsushi had on his bones. Not much, Atsushi was hardly more than a skeleton under his skin. His hands weren't quite gentle, but they were far from rough. Atsushi shuddered, so unused to being touched in a way that didn't hurt. Somehow, the firm, but not quite painful grip was even scarier than fists and guns.

"P-please," Atsushi began, managing to find his voice. "Please don't hurt me! I-" He choked on his words as the man looked him in the eyes. "I didn't do anything. I swear," he said, his words getting desperate. "I don't even know how I got here. I just- I didn't see anything! If anything was going on, I-" He sifted through his brain to figure out what to say. "Please, please let me go."

His ice cold eye ran over Atsushi's small frame. He released one of Atsushi's wrists, keeping a firm grip on the other.

"What do you mean you don't know how you got here?" His voice was calm and cold, like a steady rainfall.

Atsushi swallowed hard, his already wobbling knees giving out from under him. "I don't know… I woke up, but… I don't remember ever going to sleep." He looked down at his knees. "Everything's hazy," He muttered after a long pause. He glanced up at the man, trying to find some shred of emotion in his face, any sign that he did or did not believe him.

"Hmm…" The man hummed, crouching down to Atsushi's level, fingers still wrapped around his arm. "By chance, do you have a history of sleepwalking?"

Atsushi didn't know. Maybe sleepwalking was a normal occurrence for him. He used to be chained down in the basement back at the orphanage. For all he knew, he could have always sleepwalked.

Maybe that was why the headmaster of the orphanage had hated him so much.

Maybe he'd wandered the orphanage in his sleep and made a mess of it in his childhood, and being locked in the cellar was his punishment.

"Well?" The man prompted.

"I don't know," Atsushi whispered.

"Where were you two days ago?"

Atsushi answered.

The corners of the man's mouth pulled up in a knowing smirk, as though he'd expected Atsushi's answer.

"Well then, it looks like you _are _the one they were looking for."

Atsushi felt his blood run frigid in his veins. "What?"

The man hauled him to his feet, looking up and down his shaking form again. After a long, tense moment of silence, he clicked his tongue.

"You look like you can hardly stay upright," he remarked to Atsushi.

What he meant by that, why he'd said it, Atsushi had no idea. Before he could ask, or try to wrench his arm free and run, the man tugged him forward. He walked at a brisk pace, dragging Atsushi with him.

It took a moment before Atsushi struggled. He pulled back, dropping to the floor and writhing there to keep the man with one eye from hauling him off.

He paused, raising an eyebrow at Atsushi.

"Aren't you hungry?"

Atsushi paused.

"We have a few questions to ask you, but," he began, pausing to pull Atsushi to his feet again. "You can hardly stand and you need food."

He did need food.

He was so hungry that it was a wonder he hadn't passed out from it yet.

So, he gave up his resistance.

His feet dragged slightly as he walked, more from exhaustion than any kind of resistance. It was as though the man's reminder that he needed food had drained him of whatever fight he had left in him.

"Boy," the man said, his back to Atsushi. "What's your name?"

"Nakajima Atsushi," he responded tiredly. He blinked up at the back of the man's head, tracing out the lines of the bandages that were covered by his hair. "Who are you?" He swallowed before adding, "They called you _the demon prodigy."_

"They are very fond of that nickname, it seems," the man sighed. He turned slightly, so that his one uncovered eye gazed at Atsushi. "My name is Dazai Osamu." He gave a small smile. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Nakajima Atsushi_-kun_."

His grip on Atsushi's wrist loosened before the man-Dazai- released him completely and walked ahead of him with a quick, steady gait.

Atsushi lingered behind, nervous and not completely sure how he felt about the man.

"What do you want to eat?"

Atsushi didn't speak for a moment, partially because he felt dazed and partially because he didn't feel comfortable with asking for a specific food.

"Really, you can choose anything," Dazai encouraged. "Don't hold back."

"Umm… if it's not too much trouble… can I have chazuke?"

Dazai blinked at him.

"I'm sorry," Atsushi said quickly when he didn't get a verbal response after a few heartbeats. "That was too much? Okay… sorry… I shouldn't ask-" He stopped talking coherently, his words reducing to nervous mumbles, which were completely cut off by Dazai laughing. He looked up with wide eyes.

"You're basically on the brink of death and that's all you want."

Atsushi blinked, unsure of how to respond.

Dazai clapped him on the shoulder, catching hold of his shirt and pulling him along again. "It's no trouble at all," he said. "I'm..._borrowing_ my partner's credit card, so really, the sky's the limit." He smiled, the light of it not quite reaching his eye. Atsushi knit his brows, trying to figure out what that smile meant. It seemed so incredibly blank. Was that expression malicious? Or was it kind? Maybe he just smiled like that. Maybe he was like a few of the older children in the orphanage, and his smile just never went higher than his lips.

Atsushi bit his lip, keeping the image of the man's grin in his head, trying to unfold it to see what was at its center.

He supposed that a blank grin didn't necessarily mean cruel intentions. At least he didn't glare daggers or look like he hated Atsushi, so that was already an improvement from what he was used to.

Atsushi flinched out of his thoughts when Dazai threw open the solid doors. He followed him out with some hesitation.

"On your knees!" Someone commanded. Atsushi's blood froze when he looked up. Several guns pointed at him. Several fingers on triggers. Several bullets ready to find their mark.

He obeyed, falling to his knees with a force that would leave them black and blue.

It'd been stupid to believe that someone he'd just met would actually be genuinely kind to him. Kindness didn't happen to him. He wasn't the kind of person who deserved that, not according to the orphanage, and not according to the voices that screamed in his head.

He trembled.

"Weapons down," Dazai's voice ordered. "He's with me."

Atsushi looked up, sucking a shaky breath into his lungs. He stared at Dazai's form in front of him.

The man's arms were spread wide, his body between the gunmen and Atsushi.

"You can get up," he said, turning over his shoulder to address Atsushi. "No one's going to shoot you."

"But, Dazai_-san-_" One of the men began.

Dazai turned back to the gunmen. "Are you questioning my orders?" he asked dangerously.

Guns lowered.

"Let's go, Atsushi_-kun_," Dazai said calmly, gesturing for Atsushi to follow him.

With shaking legs, Atsushi complied, him movements slow and careful. He could feel the men's glares and perplexed eyes. The feeling of eyes on him made the hairs on the back of his neck rise.

"After you," Dazai said, opening the door to the back seat of a sleek, black car. Atsushi slid into the car, knowing from Dazai's tone earlier that the man didn't tolerate resistance.

Dazai slipped in after him, that strange smile back on his face.

And to some extent, it felt very final when the doors closed. It felt like his fate was sealed now, though he had no idea what his fate was.

The sound of the locks clicking into place didn't help with the sense of unease.

He fought the urge to squirm as his reality set in a little further.

People had been looking for him.

Dazai, the demon prodigy, had found him.

He was sitting in a car, right next to said demon prodigy.

Atsushi stiffened to keep from squirming. He stole a quick glance at the man, who looked bored. Looking at him from this angle, he appeared younger now. He looked less scary and stood less tall. Still plenty intimidating, but less so now than earlier.

"A few places that serve chazuke are probably open this late," Dazai said to the driver. "Take us to the best one."

The mention of Atsushi's favorite food made his mouth water.

It wasn't long before the car moved, it was a smooth motion, but Atsushi still lurched with it. Dazai caught him by the shoulder to keep him steady, a gentle touch that Atsushi still shied away from.

"You didn't put on your seatbelt," he commented.

"Huh?" Atsushi blinked nervously.

Dazai reached past him, tugging on a strap on Atsushi's other side. Atsushi flinched as it clicked into place.

"Have you never been in a car before?"

Atsushi reddened, shame in his ignorance and extremely humble roots welling up inside him. "Once or twice," he muttered, feeling painfully restrained under the strap. It was like he couldn't quite breathe under the strap. "We never used these though." He pulled on it to loosen its pressure on his chest.

Dazai hummed disapprovingly. "That's a blatant disregard for safety."

Atsushi didn't say anything in response. Everything he remembered from the orphanage could be classified as "a blatant disregard for safety." He struggled against the seatbelt again, sensing that he shouldn't undo it. Dazai had made his disapproval for going without a seatbelt very clear.

"You have to have it from now on. I don't want you to fly out a window if we have a collision."

That sentence caught Atsushi off guard. Why would Dazai care what happened to Atsushi if they crashed? It shouldn't have mattered. Atsushi shouldn't have mattered to him. Atsushi hardly mattered at all.

They sat in silence for a little while. Atsushi couldn't find words; his mind was too consumed with questions.

"Well, that was a fairly quick ride," Dazai commented as the locks clicked again. He pushed open the door and gestured for Atsushi to the same.

Atsushi obeyed, forgetting to press the button that would release him from the seatbelt and getting immediately yanked back into the seat. He felt heat rush to his face and fumbled with the button before slipping out of his seat and stepping out of the car.

He'd known that he was tired before, but now he felt drained in every possible way. It took all his energy just to drag his feet to where Dazai was. Atsushi hunched his shoulder, making himself just as small and exhausted as he felt.

"Come on, Atsushi-_kun,_" he said softly.

Atsushi obeyed, forcing himself to keep his chin up and his eyes on Dazai.

Dazai got him seated at a table before ordering an ungodly amount of chazuke for Atsushi and decaf coffee for himself.

What happened next was a bit of a blur. A blur of savory food and relief for his aching stomach. He had no idea how much time had passed by the time he finished, but it was still dark outside and he felt completely stuffed.

"Are you feeling better now?" Dazai asked, though he very clearly knew the answer.

"Y-yes," Atsushi replied quickly. He bowed his head slightly. "Thank you so much! I don't think I would have lived for much longer if I hadn't eaten anything."

With food filling his stomach and the bruises on his wrists faded, Atsushi found himself lulled into a sense of security. His muscles started to relax and he sat back against the chair. That tense _buzz_ in the back of his brain reduced to a nearly silent hum.

"Atsushi-_kun,_" he began as he laced his fingers on the table. "I had something I wanted to ask you."

Atsushi swallowed hard, a bitter taste creeping into his mouth.

Right, that was why he'd been so panicked earlier.

Would this become an interrogation in a matter of minutes?

"Y-yes?" Atsushi managed, pushing down the fear that he could feel rising to the surface.

"Have you heard about a tiger? A ferocious beast that stalks the streets and ravages cities at night."

Atsushi's blood ran cold, and he quickly looked down at his glass of water to avoid looking into the intensity of Dazai's eye.

"Hmm, looks like you have," Dazai said, almost sounding bored. He took a sip of coffee before continuing. "Well, I was looking for it, hence the search party you saw over at the warehouse. It was last seen in there, and we blocked off all the exits."

Atsushi's heart sped up a bit.

_It was in there with me. It could have killed me. _He glanced back at Dazai, feeling extremely indebted to him. _If he had left me there, I'd probably be eaten by it. _He shuddered, imagining the men finding his mangled, lifeless form.

"So, the search goes on!" Dazai exclaimed.

Atsushi looked down at his hands. "Th-that's good." He swallowed before speaking. "That tiger attacked my orphanage. It tore apart our food stores." He glanced up at Dazai, surprised at himself for going into such a topic, but the man had saved him from the tiger and had given him food. If anything, it was only natural to mention his situation. "W-we were on a shoestring budget already, but after that…" He looked down. "They couldn't afford to keep me, and-" He fought to control the nervous crack in his voice. "It followed me. It's been chasing me since I left."

"Were you the only one?" Dazai asked in a low voice, ignoring the part about the tiger.

Atsushi nodded. "None of us were treated very well, but…" He bit his lip. "I think they hated me the most." He looked down again, not knowing what more to say.

Dazai hummed softly before setting his coffee down. "You strike me as someone in need of a job, Atsushi-_kun._"

Atsushi raised his eyes, surprised by the comment.

"There's a position opening in my organization. How would you like to come work for me?"

"Uh… I-" He paused, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with his good fortune.

Then, he remembered the men with guns, the threatening voices, and Dazai's rough grip on his wrists when they'd first met.

"What is your organization?" He asked shyly, wincing when Dazai looked at him. "If you don't mind me asking!" Atsushi added hurriedly, not wanting to offend the person who had given him food and offered him a job.

Dazai's eye glinted in a way that Atsushi couldn't quite comprehend, then he smirked. "That's a good question. I'm a bit surprised that you didn't just let desperation take over and accept whatever was given to you. It seems you're smart enough to think things through."

Atsushi bit his lip, the weight of their conversation seemed to increase with his question.

"I work for an organization called the Port Mafia," Dazai said calmly. "It's not the calmest place of work, but it pays well enough, and you would fit in nicely."

Halfway digested chazuke churned in Atsushi's stomach. "What would I be doing?" He asked slowly.

Dazai leaned back in his chair, his eye running up and down Atsushi's frame like he was taking in every detail. "That depends on you, really. I could see you as a spy or assassin with some training, but ultimately we'd have to see where your strengths lie."

Atsushi gulped, feeling dizzy, feeling sick.

_This is the catch._

He wasn't the kind of person who got good things out of life. He'd known that for a long time. But this… This felt more like a cruel prank rather than plain bad luck.

"I don't think I'd fit in very well," Atsushi replied softly. He looked back at Dazai, expecting to see surprise or anger in his face, but his expression was blank. "I wouldn't be able to handle an exciting work environment like that. So, thank you for the offer, but I think I'll try to find something a little more normal."

He didn't know what he expected Dazai to say. Fear crept into his gut when he thought through the situation a bit more. He was in no place to reject that job after being protected and fed by Dazai, and he couldn't forget that he was talking to a man who worked around assassinations. Dazai could easily drag or threaten him into it if he wanted to.

"Well," Dazai began. Atsushi's muscles tensed, ready to run if he needed to. "Ultimately, I don't want to force you into a job that you don't want."

He loosed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you, Dazai-_sa-"_

"Of course, I can't help but worry about your future." Dazai took another sip of coffee and took a long breath in. "After all, you have no connections, no work experience, and ability users who lack control rarely fare well in this world."

"I-wait, what?" Atsushi blinked at him. "What do you mean 'ability user?"

"You haven't heard of them? People with supernatural abilities?"

"I've heard about them," Atsushi said quietly. "What do you mean that I'm one?"

"Well, if my prediction is correct," Dazai put his elbows on the table and leaned closer. "You transform into a tiger."

Atsushi physically recoiled. "W-What?" He stuttered. "That's impossible! I'm as average as humanly poss-"

"Then can you explain how you wound up in that warehouse or how the tiger managed to slip through our fingers?"

"I can't-" Atsushi tried to swallow. His mouth was completely dry. His muscles were twitching as though they didn't quite know what to do.

"We have witnesses and cameras that can prove that the tiger ran that way. To our knowledge, no one aside from Port Mafia agents got in there." He smiled again. "So, Atsushi_-kun_, how exactly did you wind up there?"

"I- I don't know-" He choked on his words, suddenly realizing why guns had been pointed at him and why he'd been hunted. He could feel the tears building up behind his eyes. "That can't be true," Atsushi managed.

"How can you be so sure?"

Words escaped his grasp. He could hardly take air into his lungs with the way Dazai was looking at him, a single brown eye expecting an answer.

Dazai leaned back, yawning and stretching. "Of course, I could be mistaken. It's possible that the tiger is still hiding in the warehouse, that you aren't an ability user, and that the tiger has been following you." His face seemed to soften a bit, the harsh glint of suspicion vanishing from his eye.

Atsushi's heart slowed a little, his tense and tired muscles loosening. He nodded. That was it. That was exactly what was happening. The tiger was still lurking in that warehouse. Atsushi had been lucky to get out of there alive, and Dazai's men would shoot it dead soon.

"In any case," Dazai continued. "I have an offer for you."

"Offer?" Atsushi croaked.

"If you are an ability user, you'll need to learn to get a handle on the tiger."

"I'm not the tiger," Atsushi whispered, more to himself than to Dazai. "I'm not…"

"In the case that you aren't, you're still wandering the city aimlessly, with a wild tiger stalking you. No food, no money, no shelter."

His words seemed to weigh Atsushi down like they were physical masses that forced him to the floor.

"So, how about we give it a month?"

"What?"

"Consider this, I take you under my wing about a month. During that time, we monitor you to confirm whether or not you have anything supernatural about you. If the tiger is truly hunting you, we'll be able to take it down more easily." Dazai smiled. "In either scenario, it gives you somewhere to go."

Atsushi looked down at his hands, the surge of panic from earlier not completely worn off. "And what happens after a month?" _After the tiger is brought down?_

Dazai shrugged. "We cross that bridge when we get there. It's your choice." He stood up before extending a hand to Atsushi. "So, what do you want to do?"

Atsushi glared down at his hands for a moment. He took a shuddering breath in and took the outstretched hand.

**Yay! Chapter posted, story begun! Feels good to get more out there!**

**I've been crocheting a lot lately. I made a bunch of BSD plushies a while ago and I'm hoping to make more soon. There are pictures on AO3 in the story "The Fine Art of Crocheting." So, feel free to check that out. **

**Any feedback for this story is very much appreciated!**

**See you next time!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, all! **

**So, when I have a long day and I'm tired, I always like to post a chapter of a fanfiction because it just makes me feel better for some reason. Of all of my fanfictions, this is the only one that I have chapters already written, so this was the only chapter I can post without binge writing all at once. **

**I hope you like it! I'm really pumped to get into this story a bit more. **

The first time Atsushi met Akutagawa Ryuunosuke, he felt it safe to assume that the man-the boy-looked down on him. That was nothing new though. Everyone looked down on him.

Atsushi had half cowered behind Dazai when they had first met, doubtful that anyone else in the Port Mafia would be quite so friendly.

Akutagawa hardly seemed to care that he was there. If Dazai hadn't stepped to the side and pushed him forward, he doubted that Akutagawa would have even spared him a second glance.

It was a long, silent moment. Dazai's hand pressed between his shoulder blades. "Well, introduce yourself."

It wasn't clear who he was addressing. The only reason why Atsushi knew the person in front of him was because Dazai had mentioned him on the ride to Dazai's apartment, where he'd slept on the couch the previous night.

"Akutagawa Ryuunosuke," he said apathetically like his own name hardly meant anything to him.

"I-I'm-My name is Nakajima Atsushi," Atsushi managed, bowing slightly. His muscles ached from being so tense.

Steely, gray eyes seemed to bore into him.

_Fair to guess he doesn't like me..._Atsushi thought without much surprise. People didn't typically like him.

Even so, the immediate rejection stung.

"Why is he here?" Akutagawa asked, raising his eyes to Dazai.

A twinge of irritation rose in Atsushi's chest when Akutagawa looked above him as though he wasn't there at all.

"We're keeping him for… observation," Dazai said. "There's been a tiger on the loose. I believe it's either hunting him or it _is _him."

Atsushi flinched at that last statement.

"So, he'll be a sort of sibling student to you for the time being."

It might have been Atsushi's imagination, but he could have sworn that Akutagawa's long, black coat rippled despite the complete lack of a breeze. There was something distinctly supernatural looking about the way it shimmered. Like… Like the coat had a mind of its own.

He pried his eyes from Akutagawa's coat and stole a glance at his face.

Akutagawa looked irritated, clear disgust etched across his face. Atsushi swallowed, feeling painfully familiar with such an expression. It was one he'd seen his whole life.

He could guess that Akutagawa was less than willing to accept Atsushi as his "sibling student," as Dazai had put it.

"Why even let him roam with those kind of stakes?" Akutagawa asked, sneering when he finally looked Atsushi in the eyes. "Wouldn't it be easier to lock him up?"

Fear and painful memories flooded Atsushi.

"I- Please, don't-" Atsushi began in panic before getting shushed by Dazai. He looked at the floor, face growing red from his small outburst.

He couldn't. He _couldn't _go back under a lock and key. That kind of life had been hell in the orphanage, and it would be hell again. He'd rather run and deal with being hunted down again than be locked up.

He heard Dazai click his tongue. Without looking up, he could sense that Dazai was fixing Akutagawa with a glare. There was a certain silence in the air, a silence that he'd known all too well in the orphanage.

"Tell me, Akutagawa-_kun_," Dazai said, his voice cold. "Did you somehow climb the ranks overnight? Are you my superior now?"

More silence.

Then, "No, Dazai-_san_…"

"Hmm, I see." He said, his bandaged hand gently coming to rest on Atsushi's head. Atsushi tensed, feeling like he'd gotten himself caught in the middle of something dangerous."So, could you explain to me what makes you think you're in a position to question my decisions?"

Dazai let his hand slip from Atsushi's head to his shoulder. Atsushi forced himself to relax.

"I can't, Dazai_-san_," Akutagawa rasped before bursting into a coughing fit.

"That's what I thought," Dazai said. "Try to remember your place in the future."

Atsushi looked up to see Akutagawa's face. His eyes metallic, and his features carefully blank.

"I will," he mumbled in response, his voice hoarse from coughing.

Dazai made a slight sound of approval.

And that was the end of it.

Atsushi released the breath he'd been holding and made a mental note to never question Dazai's decisions. Not that that would be a problem for him; he couldn't imagine that he'd ever have a reason to question what Dazai said.

"Show him to his apartment," he said, dropping a key into Akutagawa's hand.

"You're not coming?" Atsushi blurted.

Akutagawa glared at him as though he was personally offended by the question. He narrowed his eyes.

"What makes you think-"

Dazai cut him off with a sharp look before looking back to Atsushi. "As much as I'd like to show you around the apartments, Atsushi-_kun_," he began, without a trace of sarcasm. "The boss will get on my back if I don't give him a report soon." He sighed deeply. "It's so _boring_."

Then, he looked back at Akutagawa, his voice going cold. "Keep your phone on you. Mori-_san_ will probably want to meet him."

Akutagawa nodded.

And just like that, Dazai turned away from them and disappeared when he turned a corner.

"Umm…" Atsushi looked down at his feet, some panic setting in now that Dazai had left. It was a strange feeling since he hardly knew Dazai and the man had half dragged him to this point.

Akutagawa glared at him. There was something in his eyes, like he was daring Atsushi to suddenly act out of line and give him a reason to attack.

Atsushi was smarter than that though. He knew better than to start a fight in general, much less one that he would lose.

It was a long moment before either of them said anything. They were studying each other, silently and carefully. Atsushi made little mental notes.

His "sibling student," as Dazai had called him, wasn't much bigger than he was, though his coat definitely made him look more intimidating. When Atsushi looked harder, he could see how sickly Akutagawa looked. His skin held an almost deathly pallor, and on top of that, he had a fading bruise beneath his right eye.

He scowled when he noticed Atsushi's eyes on his face.

"What are you looking at?" He growled, his voice sounding like the snarl of a feral dog.

"N-nothing!" Atsushi averted his eyes to the floor.

Akutagawa didn't even try to hide his disdain. He looked like he wanted to lash out a little more, and was hardly holding himself back from doing so. "This way," he said coarsely.

/-/-/

They made it to the apartments without exchanging a single word, which was… kind of difficult for Atsushi. Questions overflowed in his mind, and he wanted answers. But Akutagawa's less than concealed hatred for him made Atsushi feel like the boy would tear out his tongue if he so much as opened his mouth.

"Dazai-_san_ said that you're staying here," Akutagawa said boredly, tossing the key Dazai had given him onto a nearby counter.

Atsushi took a minute to look around the apartment. It was more space than he'd ever had to himself. He had a full kitchen, a bedroom, and a cozy living area.

For a moment, he wondered what he would do with all of these amenities and all this space. It was new for him to have space to breathe where the air wasn't stale. He glanced back at the kitchen, and he wondered what he would really use it for aside from storing food. He had no idea how to make anything other than chazuke after all.

It was all truly more than he knew what to do with and more than he deserved.

"It's so big… Dazai-_san _is really generous." Atsushi said aloud, momentarily forgetting whom he was talking to.

Akutagawa looked around, glaring as though the walls and floors themselves had somehow offended him. He didn't say anything, but made a small sound to reluctant agreement.

Atsushi felt the blood leave his face. Though Akutagawa seemed to have nothing to say now, Atsushi hadn't forgotten his comment about simply locking him up. He stepped further into the apartment under the guise of exploring his new space. He mostly just wanted to put some distance between him and Akutagawa.

So, he wandered around, opening doors and poking his head inside. He found there was food in the pantry and in the fridge, nothing too fancy, which was fine by Atsushi. It wasn't as though he had high standards for what he ate. He had supplies to make a few bowls of chazuke, and that was exhilarating to him on its own.

For a moment, he found himself grinning, thrilled at the idea of a steady supply of nourishment. It was the first time in his life that he'd been given that luxury.

The feeling faded after a moment when he remembered that this was only temporary… If he was lucky… If his plans worked out and he left after a month.

He knew that the only way he'd stay there would be if he joined the Port Mafia. If he allied himself with murderers, spies, and assassins… And he knew that if Dazai's assumption about him was correct, he would almost certainly be stuck in that life.

_But he _saved _me. _Atsushi thought to himself, remembering how Dazai had pulled him out of hiding and fed him. _I would have starved to death if he hadn't given me food… And I would have been gunned down if he hadn't stepped in front._ He pressed his lips together, feeling the full force of his conflict crash down on him.

_I'm not the tiger. _He reminded himself firmly.

That was it.

As observant as Dazai was, the man was mistaken about Atsushi Nakajima. There was no way he had any sort of special ability. After all, if he'd had any sort of power, Atsushi would have used it by now.

"Are you actually an ability user?" Akutagawa asked as though reading Atsushi's mind.

Atsushi jumped at his voice, surprised that he'd spoken. At some point, he'd managed to forget that Akutagawa was even there.

"No," Atsushi said with certainty. "Dazai-_san_ thinks I am, but…" He shook his head.

His companion hummed doubtfully.

"What?" Atsushi asked, his patience with the doubt and silence and irritated glaring wearing thin.

Akutagawa looked down at him as though he was several inches taller than him instead of just one inch. "Dazai-_san_ is never wrong," he said before coughing into his fist.

Atsushi raised his eyebrows, not refuting Akutagawa's statement since he sensed that he was already on thin ice with this boy. Instigating an argument with him wasn't worth it, he decided.

Dazai may have been called "The demon prodigy," but that was just a nickname or a title. He wasn't an actual demon. Yes, his eyes were sharp and intimidating. Yes, his words had a way of making Atsushi tense up or relax. But those traits didn't necessarily make him a _demon._

Atsushi let the topic drop.

"Are you just staying here or…?"

"I have orders to keep an eye on you."

The way he said it made Atsushi shift uncomfortably. _Why? _He thought. _It's not like I have anywhere to go…_

"Oh," he replied quietly. Before looking around. "Do you want to sit down or…" He glanced at the pantry. "Do you want anything to eat?" He asked, hoping that any form of hospitality would dispel the awkward atmosphere.

"No."

"Oh." Atsushi said again, unsure of what else to say. He looked at the floor, less because he felt discouraged by Akutagawa's clipped tone and more because he was tired of holding eye contact with him.

It was a _relief _when Akutagawa's phone rang.

He answered it with a soft _click._ There was no "hello" or "yes?" when he held the phone to his face. Akutagawa simply listened before eventually replying with, "Understood." Then, he hung up without another word.

When they didn't move for a moment, Akutagawa scowled again.

"Come on," he said impatiently, throwing the door open and not looking back to see if Atsushi followed.

**Feedback is much appreciated! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello, all! I hope everyone is well and had a good Valentine's day, and is now having a good singles awareness day! **

**I'm cosplaying Chuuya a lot this weekend and there had been a fanfiction contest that I wanted to enter into, but unfortunately, one-shots don't come easily to me... On top of that, it takes me forever to write a fanfiction, so instead of entering a fanfic for a contest, I decided to just post a chapter of one of my WIPs. I hope you all like it!**

It only took a week.

The tiger took over after one week.

The finer details in Atsushi's memory were blurry, and really most of the broader strokes were hazy. He couldn't quite place what was real and what was fabricated by his own imagination.

It was the tiger he saw in his mind. It was a normal nightmare. The beast lunged at him, teeth bared and claws poised to strike. And Atsushi stood _frozen,_ watching the beast get closer and closer, only moments away from tearing him to ribbons.

He woke with a start, his heart seeming to beat louder to get him up. His breath caught in his throat and he choked on it, coughing like sawdust coated his throat. He grimaced before forcing himself to swallow.

"Well, Atsushi-_kun,_" came Dazai's voice with that strange cheerful, but empty tone. "It appears I was right about you."

He braced his hands against the bed and pushing himself to sit up. A wave of nausea and a raging headache accompanied his movement. "Dazai-_san,_ what… happened?" He blinked at the man before him. "And where are we?" He started to swing his legs over the edge of the bed, but Dazai caught his knee and pushed him back.

"Slow down," he said tiredly, passing a glass of water into Atsushi's hands. Atsushi took a sip, realizing how parched he was only after he drank. "Powerful abilities tend to be draining when used all at once."

"What do you mean-" Atsushi stopped himself, understanding dawning on him before he could finish his sentence. "Oh no…"

The glass slipped from his fingers, spilling water onto the sheets before rolling off the bed and shattering on the floor. The sharp crash sounded far away to him. "N-no, no, no, no…" He swallowed hard, trying to pull himself together. "That's impossible, Dazai-_san_," he said, feeling the full futility of his argument when he looked at Dazai's face. But… Something in the back of his brain told him that if he kept fighting it, this scary fate would disappear.

The executive gave him a look that seemed to say 'you want to bet?' Atsushi could sense that Dazai knew exactly what he was trying to do.

"Atsushi-_kun, _I was five feet away from you," he said. "I watched the transformation."

It was immature and stupid, but Atsushi responded with, "That wasn't me…" He knew how desperate he must have sounded, how he kept trying to deny whatever Dazai told him. "It couldn't have been…" He said in a whisper. His hands shook when he looked down at him.

_He's wrong. _Atsushi told himself. _He's wrong. Akutagawa was wrong when he said that Dazai is never wrong. They're wrong._

"Atsushi-_kun,_ you're the tiger."

It was stupid and immature, but Atsushi clapped his hands over his ears. He couldn't hear this!

_You're wrong. _He silently told Dazai. _You're wrong! Wrong! Wrong!_

Dazai's hands clamped around his wrists, prying his hands away from his ears. "I need you to _listen_," he said in a low voice. When Atsushi resisted, Dazai sighed before releasing one of Atsushi's wrists so he could reach into his pocket. "Look," he said, flipping open his phone and pushing it in front of Atsushi's eyes.

Despite Atsushi's best efforts to keep from looking, his eyes were drawn to the screen.

And he saw it.

The tiger. That white tiger that glowed with with some otherworldly power. It launched itself on cars and snarled wildly, guns having almost no effect on it. It tore someone's limbs off, eyes glowing with bloodlust.

"That's you," Dazai stated, his voice rising- likely to break through the fog in Atsushi's brain. "This is a video from last night. _This _was you last night." He grabbed Atsushi's chin when he tried to turn away from the video. Atsushi froze. "_This_ is what you are, Atsushi-_kun; _there's no running away from this. Regardless of your emotions, you need to face the facts and _accept_ _it!_" Dazai released him

Atsushi's arms went limp, his body trembling all over. He bit his lip with enough force to draw blood and covered his face with his hands. It was the only way he could think of to hide the shame that was scrawling itself across his face. It was the only way he could block out the shifting glow of the video playing on Dazai's phone.

It finally ended when something dark held the tiger down and a bandaged hand reached for the tiger's head. Then, Atsushi's own unconscious face was on the screen.

_All that time… _Atsushi thought. _All that time, I was the one taking out the orphanage resources. _He swallowed hard when another thought occurred to him. _I'm already a killer…I've hurt people… People died because of me… I didn't even have anything against them. They died because I was too close. _

His stomach churned, threatening to heave up the small sip of water he'd taken.

"So," Dazai said, breaking into his thoughts. "What do you plan to do now?"

"What do you think?!" Atsushi snapped, his brain refusing to form anything intelligent to say.

Dazai raised an eyebrow, looking more amused than irritated at Atsushi's response.

Common sense returned to Atsushi after a moment.

Dazai wasn't at all at fault for Atsushi's misfortune. He didn't turn Atsushi into a tiger. He hadn't done anything to hurt Atsushi. Dazai had been the one person to help him; it was unfair to lash out at someone who had rescued him.

"I-" Atsushi began, trying to form words with his dry mouth. "I'm sorry, Dazai-_san_. It's unfair to yell at you. I'm sorry..."

His bandaged hand came close to Atsushi's shoulder for a second, but he must have noticed the boy's wince because he let his hand drop to his side. "It's okay," he said, his voice carrying not a trace of bitterness. "You're in a rather fragile state right now, Atsushi_-kun_. It's fairl to be a bit agitated."

"A bit agitated" felt like an understatement, but Atsushi was truly relieved by Dazai's understanding.

"And, if you were scared of punishment, I'm not your superior as of this moment," Dazai remarked smoothly. "I'm just your friend." He smiled in a way that made the darkness vanish from his face.

That comment made Atsushi go rigid for a second. For all the times that it'd been mentioned, and for all the times he'd seen Dazai in action, he managed to forget that the man was high up in a notorious organization of criminals. But, Dazai had called Atsushi his friend, and the feeling Atsushi got from hearing that drowned out the fear he'd initially had of Dazai.

Atsushi managed a weak smile in response. It was practically all he could manage with the reveal of his supernatural ability looming around in his head.

"So, Atsushi-_kun, _you might recall that when we met, I told you that we'd cross that bridge when we got there." Dazai looked at him, that bright smile gone from his face, instead replaced by a narrowed eye and hard lines. "We're at that bridge now," he said. "You need to make a choice."

Atsushi looked down, the heaviness of their conversation pressing on him.

"What other choice is there?" He whispered. "I don't have any connections, and… I don't want to endanger people's lives whenever I transform, but…" He paused for a long moment. "Dazai-_san, _I don't want to assassinate people or spy on people or… or…" Atsushi looked at Dazai, his _friend, _desperately. "But there's no one else who can keep the tiger contained, is there?"

Dazai sighed deeply, as though he was just as heavily conflicted as Atsushi. "I would be able to keep the tiger under control, Atsushi-_kun_, and even better, I'd be able to help you learn how to control it." He pressed his lips together. "On the other hand, you're allowed to refuse my offer and try to find your way on your own."

"But, the tiger…"

"Yes," Dazai began when Atsushi trailed off. "Your ability puts you in a risky situation, and being alone would leave you vulnerable to the police, other organizations, and probably the Port Mafia."

"What?" Atsushi squeaked.

"Well, if you pose enough of a threat to the city, this organization could be forced to…" Dazai paused, whether it was for dramatic effect or to find the right words, Atsushi didn't know. "Put you down," he finished. "And if that's the decision the Boss makes, my hands are tied."

Atsushi had met Dazai's boss nearly a week ago, and he'd seemed nice enough, a little unnerving, but Atsushi had a hard time imagining Mori giving the order to kill him.

"He would have me killed?"

Dazai sighed. "You have to understand that the Port Mafia is willing to do whatever it takes to protect this city. And, unfortunately, being well intentioned or misunderstood won't give you any protection."

Atsushi mulled over his options, none of which seemed to have a favorable outcome.

"In the Port Mafia," Atsushi began in a whisper. "Do you think I'd be able to- to do what everyone else does?"

They both knew what he meant.

_You're killers._ He thought. _The Port Mafia kills people… They hurt people. _

Dazai regarded him silently for a moment. "Truthfully, I believe that all people are capable of taking a life. I doubt you're an exception in that case."

Silence.

Atsushi swallowed hard, trying to imagine what it would be to kill someone, to see the life drain from their body, the heat of someone else's blood on his hands.

He thought about his own life, so precious to him, yet so insignificant to the rest of the world. Could he really take that from someone else?

"Atsushi_-kun_," Dazai said, snapping Atsushi out of his thoughts and back to the present. "None of the people we fight are innocent. Quite often, their hands are more bloodied than our own."

Did that really make his situation any better?

Atsushi supposed so.

If the tiger hurt anyone, he'd prefer it not be an innocent person. The idea of joining an organization like the Port Mafia seemed dangerous, but Dazai was his only connection now.

He swallowed down the bitter taste that had surfaced on his tongue. "I'll join," he murmured so quietly that he was surprised Dazai had heard him at all.

Somehow, Atsushi could only feel numb. Maybe it was just the shock of having made such a decision to join such a group.

Dazai smiled, his single eye gazing at Atsushi with the analytical stare that Atsushi had only half gotten accustomed to. Then, he shifted, pulling something off his lap that Atsushi hadn't noticed earlier since his eyes had only been on Dazai's face and at his own hands. He draped it over Atsushi's head.

It was dark. Something soft tickled Atsushi's cheek. After a moment, he put together that it was a black coat with striped fur around the hood. He looked up at Dazai through the strands of fur.

"Welcome to the Port Mafia, Atsushi_-kun."_

/-/-/

All things considered, everything was going according to Dazai's plan. Unsurprising. Dazai's plans rarely took a wrong turn. He'd predicted that Atsushi would choose to join the Mafia because despite his reluctance to kill, he had no other connections and no other means of controlling the tiger. Dazai had hardly needed to do anything at all. Atsushi's circumstances and desperation practically did everything.

"Dazai-kun, can you answer a question for me?"

"That depends on the question."

"A vial of a certain experimental drug has been missing since yesterday. It's intended to amplify special abilities, and possibly causes the user to lose control. Would you know anything about that?"

In the end, Dazai had decided to take matters into his own hands.

"Hmm." Dazai hummed. "It sounds familiar." He pulled a vial out of his pocket and set it on Mori's desk.

The Port Mafia boss glanced at the vial before sighing. "If you needed to use it, you could have at least informed me."

"Better that this is kept off the record," Dazai said. "Besides, telling you my every action is too tedious for my taste. An executive should be allowed to operate with some level of independence."

Mori shrugged before tilting his head. "Were you too impatient to wait three more weeks?"

Dazai leaned forward, resting his chin on his fist. "Not at all," he said in a level tone. "I just had to make sure Akutagawa-_kun_ wouldn't scare him off before he came to a decision."

**Tada! Officially a Mafia!Atsushi fanfiction! **

**I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and feel free to leave a review!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello! **

**I'm in a pretty good mood. I had pancakes after eating only eggs for a few days and I crocheted an Atsushi plushie. **

**Here's a new chapter!**

Atsushi found Akutagawa to be increasingly difficult.

First of all, he wasn't the easiest person to get along with, which Atsushi had learned upon their first meeting. He'd hoped their interactions would run more smoothly at some point, but no such luck. Akutagawa mostly ignored him, only really acknowledging him with Dazai's prompting.

And things only seemed to get worse.

Only a few hours after he'd been officially accepted into the Port Mafia, Dazai had told him that Akutagawa was also in the infirmary since he'd sustained some damage when Atsushi had turned. According to Dazai, Akutagawa had helped restrain his tiger form.

If their relationship hadn't been difficult before, it definitely would be now.

So, Atsushi pushed himself out of bed to try to smooth things over as quickly as possible.

When he tried to talk to Akutagawa, the boy didn't look at him as though he wasn't listening at all. And when he finally did look at Atsushi, he glared at him as though Atsushi had spit in his face instead of apologizing profusely. With those narrowed eyes and bared teeth, Atsushi knew that his hopes for being forgiven were dashed.

So, that left them where they were now.

Akutagawa didn't ignore him or simply glare at him anymore, instead, he took to trying to pick a fight and outright insulting Atsushi when Dazai wasn't within earshot. On days when he was feeling especially bold, he'd sneer at Atsushi right in front of Dazai, which often led to a stinging remark from Dazai, which made Atsushi feel the smallest twinge of sympathy for Akutagawa, which quickly vanished after Akutagawa opened his mouth again.

/-/-/

"The Port Mafia isn't a place for the weak," Akutagawa snarled at him one day after a rough training session with Dazai. "You'll be dead before you even go on an actual mission."

Atsushi bit back a snide response. Akutagawa wasn't his superior, he knew that, but he did have seniority. And truthfully, Atsushi was a bit scared of him.

He was a killer. And… really Atsushi supposed he was a killer too, but whatever deaths he'd caused had been accidental. Akutagawa had killed people with the full intention of killing people. So had probably everyone else in the Port Mafia, but being close to Akutagawa, hearing him talk about how easily he could kill and how frequently he'd done it… It made Atsushi feel a shiver down his spine.

"I'll probably wind up skewering you if we ever spar," he said, glaring at Atsushi. "If you ever improve at all…"

Atsushi shrunk back, unsure of what to say back.

Akutagawa seemed to be waiting for a response.

Silence. Frightened eyes. Bared teeth.

He sneered in disgust when Atsushi gave no reply, and stalked away without another word.

A deep sigh of exasperation or relief escaped him. He himself couldn't even tell which it was.

Every offer of peace was met with bared teeth and harsh words. It was like Akutagawa took every attempt at conversation as a challenge. And every glace in his general direction as an insult.

It wasn't as though Atsushi had been looking for friendships since leaving the orphanage, but he'd been hoping to avoid making enemies… And yet, finding people who wanted him dead seemed to be the only thing he'd succeeded in.

/-/-/

After it had been revealed that Atsushi was the tiger, he'd eventually started hoping for some benefits for harboring a supernatural beast. Though, overall, he really wished that he had nothing to do with the tiger at all. But… If he had to live with that tiger- that _thing-_ He might as well find some silver lining.

For example, he wished the tiger would offer him a decent sense of direction. On his own, Atsushi had no idea where he was going. Nearly every other time he'd left his apartment, Dazai or Akutagawa had been with him.

And now he was kicking himself for not paying better attention to his surroundings.

This time, Akutagawa had texted him an address and a time with a curt message of "Don't be late."

At the moment, Atsushi was five minutes late, his phone was dying, and when he'd tried to call Akutagawa and Dazai for help, no one had answered-which brought him some relief since those were embarrassingly awkward calls to make. So, that left him to wander around the streets, trying to match the street names to the one in the text.

He couldn't help but imagine how pitiful he must have looked, doubling back when he hit a dead end and glancing down several roads to make sure he was going the right way.

He knew roughly where Port Mafia headquarters was, but going in there to ask for directions would be beyond embarrassing and awkward. However, he couldn't think of a better solution. So… That's what he would do.

_You would think I don't have enough dignity left to even feel embarrassment anymore._ He thought as he trudged down the street. _Nope… I still manage to feel it…_

He wondered how it would all go.

Would he just approach a receptionist at the front desk and just say, "_Hello, I'm looking for Dazai Osamu, the demon prodigy, I'm one of his students. I got an address to meet him at, but my memory isn't great and my phone is dead so I can't see what it is. Do you know where he'd be?"_

He cringed when he thought about what he would say, his face heating even though he was the only one who could hear the words. Atsushi pressed his hands against his face, rubbing his eyes as if to wake up a little and hunching over slightly, making himself smaller. He must have looked so pathetic.

"Hey, kid, you know this isn't the safest part of the city, right?"

Atsushi jumped at hearing a voice so close, taking too long to realize that he was being addressed. He glanced around frantically for a moment, trying to find the speaker among the few people walking around him on the street.

"Did you get lost or something?" A man with red hair asked. He had a rough voice that made Atsushi flinch.

Atsushi stammered before he could get his words out. "Y-Yes, I got lost…"

The man looked almost annoyed as if Atsushi had given him an answer that he'd heard too many times today. "You're in Port Mafia territory," he warned in a half scolding tone. "If you turn around, take a left at the third street, and follow that road for a while, you'll be out." He seemed to look down at Atsushi even though they stood about eye to eye. "I suggest you leave. You look like an easy mark."

Atsushi blinked, surprised by the advice. Though, it was also kind of weird; the man didn't have concern written across his face or worry in his eyes. Even though Atsushi didn't necessarily need the advice, he still appreciated it.

"I… umm… Thank you," he began, stumbling over his words. "But I-I'm-" He stopped himself. The man looked like he was in the Port Mafia, but he'd never explicitly said he was, and casually saying that he was in a massive criminal organization seemed risky. Ultimately, he decided that the man in front of him was likely Port Mafia as well. He couldn't totally explain what made him decide on that. Perhaps it was the black clothes he wore or the lingering scent of blood on him, which was the same faint smell that he'd grown to notice on Dazai and Akutagawa.

He swallowed hard before saying, "I'm in the Port Mafia."

The man's eyebrows shot up. "Seriously?"

Atsushi looked down at his hands, feeling more discouraged than offended by the disbelief in the man's voice. "Yeah."

The man squinted at him and tilted his head as if seeing Atsushi from a different angle would make him look more like a member of the Port Mafia. It must not have worked because he straightened and sighed slightly.

Atsushi squirmed under his gaze.

_Now is as good a time as any to ask…_

"Umm… I-I have to train, a-and…" He bit his lip, trying to find the least pathetic way to say what he needed to. "I can't find where I'm supposed to go."

It still sounded pathetic, but at least the words were out there now.

The man looked at him with a mix of pity and irritation.

"And I don't know where I'm supposed to go because I don't remember the address and my phone is dead," Atsushi finished as quietly and quickly as he could, partially hoping that his last statement would go unnoticed. He looked down right after he said it, playing with the hem of his shirt so he wouldn't see the disgust that was likely in the man's face.

"Who's your direct superior?"

Relief came over Atsushi in a rush; he could actually answer that question.

He raised his head. "I'm Dazai-_san's_ student."

Atsushi was not prepared to see the shift of light in the man's eyes. His bright blue eyes turned stormy in an instant as if the mere mention of Dazai's name meant the end of the world. His face suddenly twisted into a scowl.

Atsushi winced. _Did I say something wrong?_

The man gave a deep sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Of course you're his student," he mumbled, face twisting in annoyance instead of rage this time, and he muttered something about hating to talk to Dazai.

"Uh… I can go-"

"Stay."

The command seemed so sudden that Atsushi froze in his place.

_Am I in trouble?_

"I'll find him for you," he said, pulling out his phone and punching in some numbers. "It wouldn't surprise me if your situation is his fault."

"It's not his-"

The man shushed him before he could finish his sentence, pressing his phone to his ear.

"Dazai!" He half yelled into the phone, attracting some stares from bystanders. Atsushi shrunk back at his tone. "Where are you?!" A pause. "Because I found your apprentice wandering around the city looking for you!"

Atsushi's face reddened a bit at that statement.

Dazai's voice came through the phone, though Atsushi couldn't quite make out his words.

"The one who isn't Akutagawa." Then, "Well, his phone is dead." And then, "Idiot, this is _your_ fault. Doesn't matter how, crap like this is always your fault!"

Dazai's voice again.

"Don't give me orders!"

He ended the call with, "Go die already!"

The man pocketed his phone and looked at Atsushi. "So," he said casually. "I'm helping you get there."

"Y-You don't have to if-"

"It's fine," he cut Atsushi off. "I wasn't doing anything important and you look like you'll get jumped or in some way killed on the way there."

Atsushi couldn't quite argue with that logic.

He extended a gloved hand to Atsushi. "I'm Nakahara Chuuya, by the way."

Atsushi took his hand and shook it. "My name is Nakajima Atsushi."

"You're the weretiger, aren't you?"

The question made Atsushi tense up. "Y-yeah," he muttered, following behind Nakahara.

"You don't sound overly thrilled about it," Nakahara said bluntly.

Atsushi laced and unlaced his fingers. "I can't control it," he murmured.

"What did you say?"

"I-I can't… It takes over," he said a little louder so he could be heard. "I can't control when it happens, and I can't stop it." He took a deep breath in. He'd know that he was the tiger for a little more than a week; he should have been more adjusted to the fact! He shouldn't have felt his throat tighten whenever he talked about it. "And I don't remember when it happens or what I've done or… or…" He stopped himself, clamping his mouth shut to stop the words from tumbling out against his will.

He'd said too much. He must have sounded so whiney to someone in the Port Mafia, to someone who was well accustomed to death and violence.

Nakahara stopped walking. Atsushi barely halted in time to keep from running into him.

He turned around to look at Atsushi.

_Crap! _Atsushi thought frantically. _I shouldn't have said that. He's irritated at me now…_

"Yeah, it's not easy," he said, understanding filling his voice. "I know how it is."

The surprise must have shown on his face because Nakahara chuckled before his face darkened a bit. "Some abilities are hard to control. You aren't the only one with a power that goes berserk."

Then he smiled and started walking again.

"W-Wait!" Atsushi rushed to catch up. "Y-You don't have control over your ability too?"

Nakahara looked irritated for a split second. He flicked Atsushi on the ear; the boy yelped in surprise. "I have _great _control over my ability, kid." He paused as if considering whether or not he should say anything more. Then, he glanced at Atsushi's face and sighed. "Most of the time… Sometimes in battle, I have to give up control and use a form of my ability called 'corruption."

_Corruption… _

Something about the way Nakahara said it made everything, every word in their conversation, feel heavier.

"Oh," Atsushi said, not knowing how to respond. He blinked, looking down at the pavement, feeling like this whole conversation got too personal. He had only just met Nakahara after all.

"Here we are," Nakahara said, walking to the entrance of a semi-familiar building and gesturing Atsushi in. At this point Atsushi could navigate to the room where he was supposed to meet Dazai on his own. Rooms and hallways were easier to figure out than buildings and streets.

Nakahara still walked with him inside the building.

"What has Dazai been teaching you so far?"

"Umm… Combat mostly." Atsushi shrugged. "We haven't really gotten to trying to control the tiger yet."

Nakahara scoffed. "Dazai's trying to teach you combat?"

"Yes… Is there something wrong with that?" Atsushi asked, genuinely concerned that there was something wrong with Dazai teaching him how to fight.

"Only that he's absolute crap at hand to hand combat."

Atsushi thought back to the bruises that Dazai had given him during practice, and his complete inability to land a single hit when Dazai told him to retaliate.

"It doesn't seem like that to me," he muttered.

Nakahara snorted. "If you knew more about martial arts, you would agree with me."

Atsushi made an unsure sound, not knowing if he really agreed with Nakahara or not. He couldn't quite find it in himself to say anything against Dazai.

"If you ever get sick of Dazai," Nakahara began. "Which, believe me, will happen before too long-Feel free to track me down, alright?" He offered a smile.

Atsushi smiled back, a more real smile this time. He was so used to giving strained or nervous smiles, but he'd never really known how good it felt to actually just _smile. _

"I'll keep it in mind," he said, even though he couldn't imagine getting sick of the man who'd brought him into the Port Mafia.

"Well, I hope that doesn't come about any time soon," came a third voice.

Atsushi flinched from surprise as Dazai threw open the closed door to the training room.

Nakahara's easy expression immediately shifted to rage.

"After all," Dazai continued, ignoring Chuuya and putting a hand on Atsushi's head and ruffling his hair. "You are my favorite student." He smiled at Atsushi in a way that was somewhat confusing, as though he was possibly serious or just as possibly being sarcastic.

After the few weeks Atsushi had spent around Dazai, he'd hoped to understand the man a bit better, to know what he meant when he used a certain tone or what he was thinking, but he was still just as in the dark as he'd been when he'd met Dazai for the first time.

"Bandage freak," Nakahara hissed. "Why are _you _even teaching him combat? You're awful at it!"

Dazai turned to him, boredom darkening his eyes. "Oh, Hatrack, sorry, it took me a moment to see you… You're just not in my line of vision."

There was a long pause where Atsushi feared that Nakahara would just snap. The look on his face was absolutely murderous.

"...Because you're short," Dazai added. "Just in case you didn't get that… your hat has probably eaten most of your remaining brain cells by now." He shrugged.

Instincts took over.

Atsushi slipped into the training room before he heard yelling and crashing from the corridor outside.

"Idiot! I'll rip your head off!"

"Chuuya, I fully believe you would decapitate me _if_ you could reach my head."

Atsushi retreated further into the room, a little scared that a body would come flying through the wall or that something would explode.

It took about ten minutes for the yelling to quiet, and Atsushi assumed that Nakahara had left.

Dazai came in, running a bandaged hand through his hair and sighing. "Sorry you had to meet him, Atsushi-kun. Honestly, talking to Chuuya is a fate that no one deserves."

Atsushi shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "I thought Nakahara-san was nice," he muttered, feeling a little put off by Dazai's intense disdain for Nakahara.

Dazai hummed, a slight patronizing grin painted on his face. "Ah, just wait 'til you get to know him a little more." His expression hardened suddenly. "So, I feel the need to address the fact that you were late today, and later than _I_ was for that matter."

Atsushi swallowed hard, his muscles tensing at Dazai's tone like he expected to get hit. Maybe it was a conditioned response from the orphanage that he still had yet to move past. Dazai hadn't ever really hurt him. Sure, there was training, but those attacks were never malicious. His treatment of Atsushi was very occasionally rough, but Dazai had never more than bruised him.

"I-I apologise, Dazai-san," he managed, talking feeling difficult since his mouth had gone completely dry. "I-My phone was dead, a-and-"

"It's not completely your fault," Dazai cut in. "I told Akutagawa-kun to walk you here. When I called him about it, he said that you should be able to get here on your own." He sighed deeply. "I'll have a talk with him later."

"Oh… Okay. I-"

"But, admittedly, he has a point."

Atsushi's mouth snapped shut.

_Oh no…_

"You've been here for a few weeks. You really ought to know how things work at this point." Dazai's tone had changed at some point. It was the tone he often used to speak to Akutagawa.

Atsushi's heart thudded against his chest, hard and painful.

His mentor leaned closer to him, the tips of his fingers pushing Atsushi's chin up. Atsushi went rigid at the touch. He looked up at Dazai's uncovered eye, which took on a strange shade of almost scarlet in this light. Like drying blood.

"I'll accept your excuses this time." His eye narrowed a fraction of a centimeter. "Next time though, I won't be so forgiving."

Atsushi could not breathe, and his heart pounded so hard against his sternum that he felt like the bone would break with every beat. His blood ran cold under his skin.

"You understand?"

He nodded numbly, the sound of his pulse still in his ears.

"Okay," Dazai said with a grin on his face, his eye returning to the copper color that Atsushi was used to. "It's good we're on the same page." Dazai retreated.

Air finally flooded Atsushi's lungs, relief making his muscles weak. His legs could hardly support him.

_That's why… _He thought as he looked up at Dazai. _That's why Akutagawa always seems so tense around him. _Looking in Dazai's eye, hearing him speak… It was like encountering the devil himself.

"Of course, if you wound up hanging out with Chuuya again, that's way, way worse than any punishment I could come up with."

Atsushi managed a laugh. Whether it was because he was too momentarily frightened to disagree with Dazai or because of the sheer _relief _of hearing Dazai's normal carefree tone again, he didn't know.

"Let's get started."

**So, there it is. Dazai let the facade drop for a minute, scared Atsushi a bit. It's all pretty fun! **

**I changed up my profile a little, so if you want to check it out, feel free. I can't put links here, but if you look up the underlined stuff on Google, you can check out my Tumblr! Feel free to follow me! **

**Reviews are much appreicated! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

**See you next time! **

**=D**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello, everyone! Hope you're all doing well during this pandemic. **

**It's taken me a little while to post a new chapter, and I'm excited to share this one!**

For all the times Akutagawa had bullied Atsushi, Atsushi had taken it. He'd ignored it, he'd silently stood still until Akutagawa sneered and stalked off, he'd mumbled some defense that clearly fell of deaf ears.

So, it came as a shock to everyone when he finally lashed out.

All things considered, the insult had been minor compared to some of the remarks and threats Akutagawa had made. Evidently, it hardly mattered what he'd said. Atsushi had had _enough. _

And that was how they both ended up under Dazai's withering glare.

Atsushi's cheek still stung from the slap Dazai had given him when he'd had to tear his students apart. Akutagawa was sporting a similar red mark on his face.

Seconds ticked by, and silence reigned. Dazai's expression didn't shift, irritation remained etched on his face as though it had been carved onto him. Guilt pressed down on Atsushi more and more with every passing moment.

"Alright," Dazai sighed, like he was tired of glaring at them. "What happened? Who started it?"

Akutagawa glanced at Atsushi.

Atsushi bit his lip and stared down at the floor guiltily.

"Atsushi-kun?" Dazai said, incredulity flooding his tone. The irritation in his voice evaporated. Atsushi flinched at his name before hanging his head and swallowing hard.

"Well, that's a twist I didn't see coming," he said, sounding amused. His footfalls echoed as he got closer. "Look at me." Dazai was addressing him directly now.

He raised his head in response, every muscle going taut.

The guilt was probably written all over his face.

"I'd expect that kind of behavior from Akutagawa, but this is surprising coming from you, Atsushi-kun."

Atsushi's throat tightened. "I'm sorry," he choked out, turning his face to the floor again.

Dazai gave a disappointed sigh. Somehow, that sound hurt more than any physical punishment.

When no one said anything for a minute, Dazai clicked his tongue and ordered Akutagawa to leave, stating that they'd have a discussion later.

This was bad.

He'd stepped out of line.

He'd given Akutagawa an actually valid reason to hate him.

He'd done something to earn Dazai's disappointment.

_I'm such an idiot. _He thought, having trouble breathing. He flinched hard when Dazai's shoe nudged him in the side.

"So," Dazai said, his voice level. "You finally did something."

"Wha-"

"Akutagawa-kun can be… a handful." He pressed his fingers against Atsushi's forehead, forcing him to look up at him. Then, he sighed when he saw the boy's expression. "Oh, come on, don't cry. It's not that big a deal."

Atsushi hadn't even realized how close to tears he'd been, but when he blinked, he could feel the sting of salt water.

"At the very worst, you gave him a few bruises, and," he paused, taking Atsushi's chin in his hand and tilting his head so he could see the black eye he'd received from Akutagawa. "It looks like you've already started healing." He hummed, releasing Atsushi's chin. "The tiger works fast."

"But…" Atsushi began. "You-You aren't mad at me?"

"No, why would I be?"

"I- Because Akutagawa and I were fighting…"

"Well, it's not like anything was damaged beyond repair, and he had it coming, didn't he?"

Atsushi blinked.

"I'm not deaf to what he says to you. Akutagawa-kun has a less than subtle personality, after all."

_You knew? _Atsushi thought. _This whole time, you know that he'd threatened me and insulted me...And you didn't do anything?_

Despite his respect and admiration for Dazai, Atsushi couldn't help but feel a bit betrayed. He'd never told Dazai that Akutagawa had been bullying him. The reasons to keep silent seemed to outweigh the reasons to speak. Tattling would definitely earn more hatred from Akutagawa, and that was the last thing he needed. On top of that, he didn't want to whine to his superior about all of this.

Still though, Dazai had known and had seemed content to ignore it.

Dazai exhaled through his mouth. "There's no need to look at me like I've betrayed you, Atsushi-kun."

Atsushi flinched. He hadn't realized he'd let his feelings show on his face.

"You wear your heart on your sleeve," Dazai murmured, sounding amused again. His face turned serious again. "Akutagawa-kun only really respects strength and power and other things of that sort. I think it's fair to guess that despite the tiger and the fact that you wounded him in tiger form, you did not earn his respect."

Atsushi bristled at that comment. He'd half hoped to forget about that.

"I could have stepped in, and reprimanded him for being a nuisance." Dazai paused, his face thoughtful. "But, he's still rather disobedient. Unless I did something drastic, he wouldn't stop. Besides, would you even want that? To constantly be hiding behind me like a helpless child?"

"No," Atsushi said, unsure whether or not that was a rhetorical question.

"Of course not," Dazai responded. "Striking back yourself was the only way to handle this in a way that he could understand, and it's the only way you'd grow."

Atsushi definitely didn't feel like he'd grown at all. All he felt was the remaining ache of his black eye healing. Despite agreeing with Dazai, he'd hardly stood up for himself. He'd simply been sick of being pushed around and he'd heard his blood pulsing in his ears, and he had punched Akutagawa in the jaw because it was the only thing he could think to do. He'd had no end goal in mind. It'd been impulsive and immature.

Dazai's hand was in his hair before he could say anything. "It's good to know that you can stand on your own two feet," he said.

Atsushi should have told him… Should have told him that he'd done nothing worth praise… He'd been angry and he'd panicked and that was all…

But he didn't speak. Dazai's praise felt too good to reject. It fed something in him, something that had been shriveled and neglected since the day he was born.

Did Dazai know how undeserved his praise was? Probably not… He didn't seem the kind of person who gave praise or punishment if it wasn't in some way earned.

So, possibly against his better judgment, he nodded, accepting everything Dazai offered to him.

Dishonesty wasn't at all his strong suit, but he tried it anyway. His guilt tasted bitter and he swallowed it down, trying to ignore the slight stinging sensation in his throat.

"Now that that's smoothed over," Dazai began. "It's about time we get something done."

Atsushi nodded.

/-/-/

Despite what Dazai had said, Atsushi didn't think his fight with Akutagawa earned him any respect at all. In the following several days, Atsushi found that Akutagawa was growing more and more persistent.

Before, it'd just been a few aggressive remarks and few shoves. Before, he'd get bored after a few minutes. Now though, Akutagawa was less hesitant to show his ability and he seemed to take the fact that Atsushi was still breathing as a direct challenge.

It wasn't as though Atsushi could brush it off as easily as he'd done before. Akutagawa knew that he could actually fight back now… and for whatever reason, that seemed to encourage him.

Even worse, Dazai seemed to expect him to fight now.

His mentor had made it clear that he wouldn't coddle Atsushi. The man didn't want to act as a shield for him… Not against this threat at least.

He told himself that he'd brought this on himself. He'd snapped, and now everyone expected him to lash out whenever he was provoked… and it bothered him. Atsushi wasn't particularly angry by nature and he didn't like fighting, so he hated being treated like he did.

More than anything, it was _exhausting. _

/-/-/

It had taken longer than expected.

Dazai wasn't surprised when Atsushi had finally pushed back against Akutagawa. To be perfectly honest, he'd been waiting to see that happen since he'd started training the two of them together. And it had only been a matter of time thanks to Akutagawa's competitive streak. People could only be pushed for so long.

Of course he'd acted irritated after breaking up the fight. It's what any normal person would expect, after all. Actively encouraging Atsushi to fight with Akutagawa would likely scare him. He wasn't eager to fight.

But now, Atsushi must have realized Dazai's approval with him fighting and taking action on his own. And he clearly craved Dazai's approval, not as much as Akutagawa, but enough for Dazai to work with.

So, Dazai was sure that this wouldn't be the last fight he'd need to break up.

Admittedly, having a student who was so mild mannered-while refreshing- was frustrating. The only times Atsushi had shown any type of aggression was when he was stressed or panicked enough. Atsushi would likely prove a bit more difficult to train than Akutagawa since inflicting physical pain was partially off the table; outright beating Atsushi would make him hate Dazai, and while Dazai didn't mind being hated, resentment would make Atsushi less malleable. And he had no inclination to have to train another difficult student.

**So, Atsushi finally did something... And Dazai is making some progress with him. That should be fun. **

**Unrelated thing:**

**Social distancing has been kind of crazy. Never have I ever wanted to hang out with people so much... On the bright side, I got some crocheting projects done. I made a San from ****_Princess Mononoke _****and an Ahsoka plushie from ****_Star Wars:The Clone Wars. _****I'm really proud of how they turned out! I'm also remaking one of my Dazai plushies, since I was still learning how to crochet when I made one of them! Feel free to check them out on my Etsy shop: CrochetedByAnnika or on my Tumblr: akinachambers**

**Thank you all so much for reading my fanfiction! Knowing that someone likes what I write means the world to me! **

**Stay safe!**


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